Politics Are Everywhere

Sometimes I have trouble trying to describe my beliefs and political affiliations. I often try to refrain from talking politics with people if I am unsure of their affiliation but sometimes I just can't help myself and have to speak my mind.

I am registered with one party but I am a firm believer that not everything this party says and does is right. There are issues where I seem to identify with the other side more. In general, my political party is the "What's Right" party (and also The Rent is Too Damn High Party - doesn't get much better than that). In other words, I think what's right is right regardless of who says it, like a Democrat or Republican.

Another issue I struggle with is nature versus nurture. I will find myself saying one thing with one group of people, and then arguing for the other side with another group of people. What I do believe in is taking responsibility for one's actions. If we made excuses for everyone, this would would be a scary place with inherently bad people on the loose. 

While I was reading The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that what I couldn't put into words, Stieg Larsson could. I don't think that this book is all it's cracked up to be (I plan on writing a full review soon) but his words on a few particular pages really struck me. I had no idea that part of the plot had to do with the Swedish government and laws until I reached the end. 

Here is an excerpt:

"We know that Gottfried was responsible for the first series of murders, between 1949 and 1965."

  "OK. And he brought on little Martin."

  "Talk about a dysfunctional family," Blomkvist said. "Martin didn't really have a chance."

  Salander gave him a strange look.

  "What Martin told me - even though it was rambling - was that his father started his apprenticeship after he reached puberty. He was there at the murder of Lea in Uddevalla in 1962. He was fourteen, for God's sake. He was there at the murder of Sara in 1964 and that time he took an active part. He was sixteen."

  "And?"

  "He said that he had never touched another man - except his father. That made me think that... well, the only possible conclusion is that this father raped him. Martin called it 'his duty.' The sexual assaults must have gone on for a long time. He was raised by his father, so to speak."

  "Bullshit," Salander said, her voice as hard as flint.

 Blomkvist stared at her in astonishment. She had a stubborn look in her eyes. There was not an ounce of sympathy in it.

  "Martin had exactly the same opportunity as anyone else to strike back. He killed and he raped because he liked doing it."

  "I'm not saying otherwise. But Martin was a repressed boy and under the influence of his father, just as Gottfried was cowed by his father, the Nazi."

  "So you're assuming that Martin had no will of his own and that people become whatever they've been brought up to be."

  Blomkvist smiled cautiously. "Is this a sensitive issue?"

  Salander's eyes blazed with fury. Blomkvist quickly went on. 

  "I'm only saying that I think that a person's upbringing does play a role. Gottfried's father beat him mercilessly for years. That leaves its mark."

  "Bullshit," Salander said again. "Gottfried isn't the only kid who was ever mistreated. That doesn't give him the right to murder women. He made that choice himself. And the same is true of Martin."

  Blomkvist held up his hand.

  "Can we not argue?"

  "I'm not arguing. I just think that it's pathetic that creeps always have to have someone else to blame."

Brilliant.

oxo,

Lex

Well Said, Chris Colfer

Last night, January 16, Chris Colfer won a Golden Globe for his outstanding performance as Kurt Hummel on "Glee." If you're wondering who Chris Colfer is or what this "Glee" business is all about, crawl out from under your rock stat and quickly set your DVR for the next episode because (and trust me on this) you're missing out.

As Colfer accepted his award for Best Supporting Actor, he gave one of the best acceptance speeches I have ever heard (and please note that I, too, have been watching awards shows since I was an embryo). This one ranks right up there with Hilary Swank and Reese Witherspoon.

I immediately fell in love with his opener, "I think I just dropped my heart between Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore." Could he be any cuter? But it was his closing that really sealed the deal:

"Most importantly, to all the amazing kids that watch our show and the kids that our show celebrates that are constantly told no by bullies in their school and they can't be who they are... well, screw that, kids!"

Good for you, Chris!

In case you missed it, check out Colfer's truly amazing speech on PopEater.com:
http://www.popeater.com/2011/01/16/chris-colfer-acceptance-speech-video/

oxo,
Lex

Talk About a Reality Check

I love daytime television. For the five months I was unemployed after graduating college, Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, and Oprah were my saving grace. Now, just about a year since I got my first grownup job, I DVR all three shows so I can keep up (keep up when I actually watch them that is). Yesterday when I got home from work I decided to watch that day's Oprah episode which, I'm quite certain, featured one of the most incredible yet gut-wrenching stories I have ever heard.

Chris and Lori Cable were a happily married couple with three children under the age of six on the day Lori got into a car accident that would take the lives of their three children. Lori and her mother, Cindy, had taken the three children, 5-year old Kyle, 4-year old Emma, and 2-year old Katie to the mall for Kyle's birthday. On their way home they hit a ton of traffic on the freeway. It was then that the children's lives would come to an end.

A truck traveling 55 mph, and carrying 40,000 pounds of cargo, slammed into the the back of Lori's minivan while she stopped because of traffic on the freeway. Lori was knocked unconscious and the children were severely injured. The five of them were split up and taken to different hospitals. It was then that Chris received a call while at work notifying him of the accident. He quickly arrived at the hospital where Lori and Cindy were being treating to find out that both his daughters had passed away. Kyle was in bad condition so Chris and Lori rushed to the hospital where he was being treated to be near his bedside. He was brain-dead and after tearful and painful goodbyes, they took him off life support. "I held my hand on his chest until his heart stopped beating and he was gone," Chris told Oprah.

In the days, weeks, months to follow Chris and Lori had to pick out three caskets, they had to reserve the plots where their children would be buried, they had to somehow get used to a house filled with deafening quiet when they used to hear singing and laughter. They coped and grieved. They attended counseling and promised each other that they would not commit suicide, leaving the other completely alone.

A few months after their children's deaths, they decided they wanted to have more children. After going through the in vitro process, Chris and Lori were told they were going to have triplets -- two girls and one boy. I would be lying if I sat here and said (wrote) that I did not have shivers up my spine as I heard them speak these words. I have goosebumps again just thinking about it.

At this point in the show, they brought the 2 1/2-year old triplets out onto the stage. The resemblance between them and their older sisters and brother was remarkable. I continued to experience chills as I sat there and watched this amazing story unfold.

It was then that I had possibly the biggest reality check of my life. I'm twenty-two, nearly twenty-three, years old. I've had to experience hardships and tragedies during my life, sure -- who hasn't? But sitting here listening to this story made me realize how truly lucky I really am. I have such an incredible life and I don't appreciate it nearly as much as I should.

I made a vow to myself that the next time I feel frustrated and upset because my train is delayed ten minutes, making me get home ten minutes later than usual, or someone cuts me off on Route 4, or the next time I feel infuriated at the tourists in Manhattan because they think it's acceptable to stop in the middle of the sidewalk during the morning walk rush-hour, I will think twice. I will remember that in the grand scheme of things, these situations that might have otherwise made me waste a significant amount of energy by focusing on negativity really don't matter. They don't mean anything. Life is way too short to waste time being angry over something minuscule and Chris and Lori's inspiring story reminded me of that.

I urge all of you to try and do the same -- think twice the next time you're ready to explode. Think of Lori and Chris and the other families out there facing similar tragedies that haven't been featured on a TV show. Think twice for them and for yourselves and appreciate every single minute of every day, even the bad ones because I'm sure Lori and Chris would be willing to experience a lifetime of tough days if it meant having their children back.

Lex

That's What I Call One Un-Happy Meal

Results from "The Happy Meal Project," an experiment done by a New York City photographer who bought a Happy Meal and let it sit in her home, unrefrigerated, for 180 days in an attempt to capture its' decomposition, or lack thereof,  were recently blown wide open.

For six months, Sally Davies took photos of the Happy Meal, which consisted of a hamburger and fries, and for six months nothing changed, proving her theory that the world-famous fast food chain puts an insane amount of preservatives (and other crap we don't even know about) in their "food." Day after day, Davies photographed the Happy Meal which was not developing any mold or showing signs of decay. By day 171 the Happy Meal looked almost identical to the picture taken on day one. The only difference being that the fries had shrunken a bit and the burger looked plastic and was rock hard, as reported by The Daily Mail. So, did Davies blow McDonald's cover?

I cannot say that I'm entirely convinced that Davies did not take a Happy Meal home on April 10, 2010 and then preceded to take a series of pictures featuring the meal from different angles and views all in that same day. After all, I am a publicist. What does this look like to me? A PR stunt to get this photog some free publicity - and a good one at that.

Sally, if you were hurting for work and did this to get your name out there then bravo, I salute you. If you were simply trying to disprove McDonald's promises that they use 100% USDA-inspected beef, then I have to say I am disappointed and a little peeved at your experiment. After all, what you don't know doesn't hurt you, right?

Whether these claims are true or false I will continue to eat McDonald's, so Ronald you need not worry, you still have one customer at least. I have to admit that imagining life without a good ole' American Big Mac once in a while makes me quite sad.  Like my nutrition professor once told me, "everything in moderation" (even moderation). Maybe one day I'll try this experiment out for myself to know for sure, but I have to admit that I doubt I would be able to stay in a room with an un-touched burger and fries for longer than an hour.

Check out the article from The Daily Mail and see for yourself.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1319562/McDonalds-Happy-Meal-bought-Sally-Davies-shows-sign-mould-6-months.html#ixzz12FJZn9Mv

It's Tough to be a College Student

On September 22, 2010 Rutgers University freshman, Tyler Clementi, took the fatal plunge off the George Washington Bridge into the Hudson River between New York and New Jersey. Why would an 18 year old boy with his entire life ahead of him make such a drastic, and definite, decision? 

From the outside looking in, I have led the picture-perfect life. I know that somewhere in the world there are children wishing for things I have had the luxury of having my entire life, most likely taking them for granted. And yet with everything that came with my privileged life, growing up was hard. It's still hard. But now, at the ripe age of 22, on the ledge of jumping into 23, I know that as a teenager there were some "crises" that really weren't crises at all. I know that now because I'm older. I'm wiser. I'm more mature. When Clementi learned he was being filmed by his roommate via a webcam having a sexual encounter with another male Rutgers student without his knowing, the aftermath was a crisis. And a legit one at that. Not the type of crisis where you're sending a nasty text about a friend only to realize that you had accidentally sent it to that said-friend. A real crisis. And why wouldn't it be? 

When you enter college, you are putting yourself out there. You're on your own. You might be trying to reinvent yourself, to get away from a past in high school you would be lucky to forget, to better yourself or something of the like. High school is hard, and when you move away to a college campus you have the hopes that things are going to be different. I'm sure Tyler Clementi had vivid dreams of what college life would be like. I'm sure it didn't include any of what happened.

Then there's Dharun Ravi's side, Clementi's roommate who arranged the webcam taping. If you ask me, Ravi doesn't get a side. We can all sit here and say that he was eighteen years old, he was immature, he was just messing around. We can make excuses for him but the truth of the matter is that the only thing those excuses do is pave the way for more immature college students to do something similar and also get away with it.

There is another point stemming from this situation as a whole, and that's the issue of heterosexuality vs. homosexuality. I don't know if this is necessarily a matter of homosexual bullying or just bullying in general. If this situation involved heterosexual sex, I would still feel the same way. I would still think that Ravi's barbaric act was disgusting. My question is, would everyone else?

I'm not sure if this unfortunate situation caused such a public outcry because Clementi was with another young man but I certainly hope not. Whether the sexual encounter was with two boys or a boy and a girl, it is still something that was supposed to be private. Why would it have to be different if it involved a boy and a girl? What if the girl involved was president of the celebacy club and suddenly her reputation was turned upside down? Still humiliating. Still a crisis, especially for a teenager.

No matter how strong I feel about this case, and I feel very strongly about it, I do not think that Ravi and his accomplice, so to speak, should be brought up on charges of manslauder. The fact is that Clementi chose to take his own life. There was no gun held to his head, although I'm sure he felt like there was. It is devastating that he made such a final and permanent decision. 

It's very upsetting to me because I can truthfully say that I have been there. I have been in the tunnel and was unable to see any trace of light ahead whatsoever. I get it. I get why he felt that he did not have another choice, even though he did. At eighteen you don't see the other choice. You don't see the light. And it's unfortunate. But all of these things add up to Clementi's reaction to Ravi's action. I will admit that this is a very sticky situation because what Ravi did inadvertently caused Clementi's death. I see how it's arguable, I really do. I cannot sit here and call him a murderer though, not by any means. A stupid kid. A punk. A kid with a lotof growing up to do, sure. But not a murderer. I can't say that.

I will be following this case closely, and I encourage others to do so as well. It's unfortunate that Tyler Clementi had to lose his life for such a public outcry against bullying to arise, but I am hoping that whatever happens will ensure that Clementi did not lose his life in vain. I hope for his sake, for his family's sake, that his death will mean something. That it will do something. That it will change something.